Anne Hathaway: "I Needed to Look Like I was Dying" for Les Mis

I'm grateful to see a story where an actress and actor are honest about their weight loss for a film (A film I have yet to actually see...)! They both talk about how it was miserable and unhealthy to lose weight the way they did and do not encourage it for others. I'm happy to see they are both looking healthy and happy after filming as well.

Check out Hugh Jackman & Anne Hathaway as they discuss preparing for their roles.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/20981459

"I was an actor and I had to do a role and I find it kinda weird the way the media can glamorise this sort of thing.

"I didn't lose the weight to look attractive," added the Oscar and Bafta nominated star.

"I needed to look like I was dying and I worry that all that attention adds up to an unhealthy way."

There have been widely varying rumours as to how little Hathaway ate to portray the tragic character of Fantine. But when asked to clear those up, she said: 

"You know I appreciate the question, I don't want to answer it because I think that I was on a starvation diet to look like I was near death in a film and I don't want anyone to feel like,'Oh I just want to drop like a couple of pounds.'

What to say and what NOT to say when talking to kids about weight

http://moms.today.com/_news/2011/09/14/7746147-what-to-say-and-what-not-to-say-when-talking-to-kids-about-weight

1. DO talk about living a healthier lifestyle. Explain that making healthier eating choices will fuel your child’s body for school and fun and that getting physical activity and enough sleep will energize him.
DON’T talk about losing weight or dieting. Placing the focus on weight loss or diets can contribute to eating-disordered thoughts and behaviors. In addition, kids need a wide range of foods to be healthy, but diets don’t provide this; balanced choices do. Don’t make any forbidden, as there is a place for all foods in a healthy lifestyle.

2. DO make it a family affair. Tell your child that everyone in the family will work together to live a healthier lifestyle and encourage him or her to learn about healthy habits on their own and in a fun way by visiting www.fit.webmd.com.
DON’T single out one child. It will be too difficult for a child to make healthy changes if she is the only one eating healthy and exercising.

3. DO talk to your child about making sure he gets enough sleep and has adequate time to relax. When kids are sleep deprived or stressed, it is difficult for them to keep a healthy weight
DON’T pack your child’s schedule so full of activity that there is no time for unstructured play. All kids need downtime to play actively and creatively. Having the opportunity to do so will help your child relax and unwind in order to get a good night’s sleep.

4. DO make exercise fun. Explain that exercise can be play – like bike riding and playing in the park. When your child realizes this, she will be happy about moving her body.
DON’T tell your child that he must exercise every day. Instead, tell him that you will begin to plan fun ‘moving’ activities so the whole family can get healthier together.

5. DO tell your child that you love her inside and out. Reinforce that you are proud of her and tell her that, even if it takes a while to become successful at making healthier choices, you will support her as she tries.
DON’T tell your child she is ‘fat’ or ‘overweight’. Also, resist the urge to ask her to ‘try harder’ or ‘work at it more’ – or similar phrases. Your child will hear only the negatives. It is tough to become healthier, so your child needs as much support and positive feedback as possible.

For more tips and advice, including how to speak to kids of specific ages – and what to do if you suspect your child is being bullied about his or her weight – please visit www.webmd.com/raisingfitkids. 

A Mother's Influence on Beauty

Growing up in our culture can be daunting- especially as a girl. I felt like I was always receiving messages about how I should feel, act and look. "You shouldn't wear orange if you're a red head." "Always cross your ankles and never your legs." "Never go out in public without makeup." "Never speak your mind because it might be offensive to somebody." There were a lot of silent messages, too. I would be standing in line at the grocery checkout and notice all of the magazines with girls with perfect, tan skin, with their collar bones visible and figured that's what I would need to look like to be considered beautiful in our society. Luckily, I had a great mother to counteract these false definitions of beauty.

My mom trained me about beauty from a young age. She would often comment on how grossly skinny some girls were. Or she'd mention that I looked beautiful. Anytime she'd hear me commenting about how wide my hips were or how upset I was about the size of my breasts, she'd remind me that I was beautiful and that my body was a gift from God. She also taught me about the importance of looking like a real woman with curves and how part of our purpose as women is to bring children into the world. Without real hips, breasts, fat storage etc. this wouldn't be possible.

My parents have always been affectionate with each other. I remember my dad always complimenting my mom on how beautiful she was. My mom and dad would go out on fancy dates at least once a month where my mom would wear a silk blouse, skirt and stilettos and put on some flashy lipstick. I always thought she looked beautiful. The funny thing is, my mom isn't exactly tan nor was she a size 2. She knew how to take care of herself and her body and she had confidence that radiated beauty.

My mom is definitely the one who provided the foundation for my definition of beauty to come about. Without the great example of my mother and regular conversations with her regarding healthy body image, wellness and beauty, I would still be very confused and trying to figure out how to fit in. Mothers (and fathers) have such a huge impact on shaping their children's definition of beauty. One expert said, "Parents who maintain healthy attitudes about their own bodies, who model healthy eating behaviors, and who provide nutritious food for their family, preparing, serving, and sitting down to eat meals together with children as frequently as is possible, virtually immunize their child from developing eating problems."1 I thought of a few things that my parents did and wanted to share them with you. Obviously, these tips aren't fool proof, but they will definitely provide a great base from which your can learn and grow.

Here are some tips for mothers to help influence their daughters' definitions of beauty:

1. Never demean your own body. People can tell if you aren't satisfied with your body. It will radiate in how you carry yourself, talk, act, what situations you avoid etc.

2. Respect your body. Don't fall for the fad diets or other tricks that suck you into the unhealthy body ideal of today.

3. Encourage a wellness lifestyle. Do exercises that you enjoy. Eat a well-balanced diet.

4. Be aware of how you may be getting caught in the American ideal for beauty. For example, don't purposefully buy clothes that are a smaller size and then use them as motivation to get smaller.

5. Be aware of comments you make regarding other's appearance and/or eating habits. Never joke, shame or make comments about other's body size and/or eating habits. These off-hand comments may be the most memorable for your children.

6. Talk openly with your daughter about body image and beauty regularly. Help her distinguish between what's real and what's not. Help her have realistic expectations of beauty for herself and others.

7. Help your daughter have a vision for her future that goes beyond her appearance. Help her find hobbies and activities she enjoys and establish goals with her. Encourage her in the activities she enjoys.

8. Pay attention to comments your daughter makes about her body and appearance. Listen and be empathic. Although some comments may be irrational, she still genuinely feels this way. Be there as a person for her to talk to. Engage her in a conversation about what she thinks she could do to improve her body, health, ability to do certain things etc. and how she plans to do this.

9. Teach your daughter that there is no such thing as the "ideal" body. Beautiful bodies come in all shapes and sizes.

10. Encourage your daughter to be aware of and share her feelings instead of harboring them in her body. Young children, especially, tend to manifest anxiety and other stressors in the form of stomach and other body aches.

11. Discourage extreme behaviors such as sleeping too long, too little or too late, dieting, exercising too much or too little. This will help her feel better in her body.

12. Help her have a respect for the many amazing functions and purposes her body serves.

13. Praise your daughter for who she is, not how she looks. Find non-materialistic things to compliment her on such as her ability to get along with so many people, her dedication in work, and her passion.



*I wrote this article as part of the Recapturing Beauty Campaign started by BYU Women's Services (they have a blog, too). You can see my original article here.

"Maggie Goes on a Diet"

"This book is about a 14 year old girl who goes on a diet and is transformed from being extremely overweight and insecure to a normal sized girl who becomes the school soccer star. Through time, exercise and hard work, Maggie becomes more and more confident and develops a positive self image." (via)




This book just contributed to a nice conversation between the hubby and me. We decided we are both right in our opinions and our culture is messed up.


Your thoughts?

Photo-shopping

See the full album at Beauty Redefined's facebook page or blog 
http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.193230777374742.45179.193209467376873

Mormon Women: The Weight of a Soul

This was such a powerful interview.
Go read about Beth and her battle with body image and eating.
http://www.mormonwomen.com/2011/07/13/the-weight-of-a-soul/

The really hard thing about eating disorders is that you have to eat. You can’t separate yourself from food.

How is Beauty Defined?

• The average woman sees 400-600 ads per day.
• By the time she is 17 years old, a woman has received over 250,000 commercial messages through the media
• 4 out of 5 girls at age 10 admit that their biggest fear is being fat 
• Each year Americans spend:
  •$40 billion for diet products
  •$20 billion for cosmetics
  •$300 million for cosmetic surgery
  In 1994 total retail sales for the American fashion and footwear industries were estimated at $246.5 billion

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen nor touched . . . But are felt in the heart.
-- Helen Keller 

What's the Ideal Body Figure

I love studies like this that examine things that I'm interested in. I wonder how these attitudes play into disordered eating, workout obsessions, how males and females treat each other, the effects this has on a relationship, the cultural context etc.

This study was done in 1985 and is super popular. People replicate it all the time and look at differences between generations, cultures etc.

Basically, they asked men and women to note where they believe they are currently on the body scale, then note where they would like to be ideally, and what they think is attractive to the opposite sex. They also asked them to mark on the opposite gender's chart what they find attractive.

It's interesting to me that men think they should be bigger/bulkier and women think they should be skinnier. I wonder how much this has changed in the past few years. I think there are more guys trying to be skinny lately as well as the pressure to be really muscly so it's kind of divided (Note all the nasty skinny jeans men wear lately. I guess they're just helping with survival of the fittest.)

Click on the figure to be able to read it.
Fallon, A. E., & Rozin, P. (1985). Sex differences in perceptions of desirable body shape. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 94, 102–105.

It Wasn't About the Food

I wouldn't say for sure that I've ever had an eating disorder, but definitely disordered eating.

I don't quite know or completely understand how it started or why or really even when exactly. I don't even have super concrete memories. And the memories I do have are a bit scattered.

I've always been a picky eater. I still struggle eating most of my vegetables. Peas still trigger my gag reflex. Eew!

After I skipped 6th grade, I started at the Junior High. I was sooo nervous. I really like people to like me. I didn't want to be a nerd and an outcast. I wanted friends.

I had so much anxiety that it literally made me feel sick to my stomach. I think at least 3-4 times the very first week, I walked into the bathroom at school first thing- which was usually empty- and puked. I always felt so much better after puking. Natural rush of endorphins. I would feel better. Like I could take on the day. Energized. And hungry, too. Sometimes, I liked feeling my stomach growl. It empowered me more. I feel weird writing that now, but I can still remember the feeling. I remember at night feeling it rumble and feeling like I was in control.

I remember that I would puke at almost the same exact time every day. One time, we were running late to school and I made my mom pull over so I could puke. It wasn't really about food or being fat- or was it? I had so much anxiety. Sometimes, now, I just want to puke because I know it will make me feel better. I haven't since junior high, though. But even 10 years later the thought is still there when I get really stressed. Even when I was puking, it wasn't because I physically made myself. I know now that it's really common for kids to have a somatic manifestation of their worries and fears.


My parents (wise ones that they are) noticed I wasn't eating very well and made me keep track of every single thing I ate in a day on a white board for them to see. I don't really know how it happened or why. I remember my mom scaring me with threats of going to the hospital and having a tube down my throat. I hate hospitals and needles. My friends would come over and see the white board with the foods that I ate and wonder about it. I felt embarrassed.

I also remember that I wasn't really losing weight which I found very odd since I thought puking up food would make me skinnier. I was always envious of the skinnier girls. I hated the fact that I had curves. I remember my first bra was a 34B. I would sometimes wear two sports bras to try and hide them.

One day, in junior high, I just stopped puking. I stopped feeling as nervous. I remember feeling like I was fitting in. I had a great group of friends. I felt like I would be fine. I had power. I was accepted. I don't really remember the day exactly, but I really think friends and a sense of control and acceptance helped.

I think that's why I believe so much in Group Therapy. Being a co-facilitator for Fed Up With Food changed me for the better. There were (and still are) so many amazing girls in there. They are so lucky to have each other. At times, I still struggle a lot with my body. I still struggle sometimes with food. I can easily get caught up on numbers and good/bad foods. Being in that group helped me a lot as a facilitator. I think it's just good to know other people have the same fears as you.

I hope to work with young girls struggling with things like I struggled with. It's so hard to make it through junior high and high school. It's hard to feel accepted and loved and still cool. More than ever, girls receive the message that skinny is good. I've heard of girls as young as 5 with disordered eating. Most of the time, it isn't about food. Even here in "Happy Valley" where there are lots of LDS girls taught how their body is a temple, don't judge, have love for all, just do your best etc. It still happens.

If any of you have struggled with something like this, feel free to comment (anonymously if you want). What do you think "caused" it? What was it about for you?

Find the Divinity Within

"Instead of embarking on a more meaningful quest [women] have placed their faith in products and images. Rather than loving their bodies, and being peaceful, respectful, and gentle with them, women have attacked, manipulated, and controlled their physical selves, never feeling satisfied or content.”- Margo Maine, PhD. (“Body Wars,” p. 10)

“So many of our sisters are disheartened, even discouraged, and disillusioned. . . Satan has unleashed a seductive campaign to undermine the sanctity of womanhood, to deceive the daughters of God and to divert them from their divine destiny. He well knows women are the compassionate, self-sacrificing, loving power that binds together the human family. He would focus their interests solely on their physical attributes and rob them of their exalting roles as wives and mothers. He has convinced many of the lie that they are third class citizens in the kingdom of God.”- Elder Richard G. Scott (Ensign, May 2000, p. 36)

“What a clever and seductive plan, what a way to distract us and keep us from understanding the influence we have and what we can effect in the lives of others if we are so distracted and overwhelmed with what a clothing, diet, and entertainment industry say we need to look like. These pursuits can take up not only an immense amount of time but an inordinate amount of energy and can totally consume us, our lives, and this precious probationary period which we have been allotted.”- President James E. Faust (Ensign, Nov. 1999)

• Girls who diet frequently are 12 times as likely to binge as girls who don’t diet (Neumark-Sztainer, 2005).
• 75% of American women are dissatisfied with their appearance
• Over one-half of teenage girls and nearly one-third of teenage boys use unhealthy weight control behaviors such as skipping meals, fasting, smoking cigarettes, vomiting, and taking laxatives (Neumark-Sztainer, 2005).
• 42% of 1st-3rd grade girls want to be thinner (Collins, 1991).
• 81% of 10 year olds are afraid of being fat (Mellin et al., 1991).
• The average American woman is 5’4” tall and weighs 140 pounds. The average American model is 5’11” tall and weighs 117 pounds.
• Most fashion models are thinner than 98% of American women (Smolak, 1996).
• One-third of all American women wear a size 16 or larger.
• 46% of 9-11 year-olds are “sometimes” or “very often” on diets, and 82% of their families are “sometimes” or “very often” on diets (Gustafson-Larson & Terry, 1992).
• 91% of women recently surveyed on a college campus had attempted to control their weight through dieting, 22% dieted “often” or “always” (Kurth et al., 1995).
• 95% of all dieters will regain their lost weight in 1-5 years (Grodstein, et al., 1996).
• 35% of “normal dieters” progress to pathological dieting. Of those, 20-25% progress to partial or full-syndrome eating disorders (Shisslak & Crago, 1995).
• 25% of American men and 45% of American women are on a diet on any given day (Smolak, 1996).
• Americans spend over $40 billion on dieting and diet-related products each year (Smolak, 1996).
• Young girls are more afraid of becoming fat than they are of nuclear war, cancer, or losing their parents.

"There is something of divinity within each of you. You have such tremendous potential with that quality as a part of your inherited nature. Every one of you was endowed by your Father in Heaven with a tremendous capacity to do good in the world. Train your minds and your hands that you may be equipped to serve well in the society of which you are a part. Cultivate the art of being kind, of being thoughtful, of being helpful. Refine within you the quality of mercy which comes as a part of the divine attributes you have inherited.
Some of you may feel that you are not as attractive and beautiful and glamorous as you would like to be. Rise above any such feelings, cultivate the light you have within you, and it will shine through as a radiant expression that will be seen by others. You need never feel inferior. In summary, try a little harder to measure up to the divine within each of you. As Alma said, “Awake and arouse your faculties” (Alma 32:27)."- Gordon B. Hinckley, “The Light within You,” Ensign, May 1995, 99